Sheltered from the storm

That was the last time I felt underwater.

I understood then that the crystal cage I felt trapped in, unable to touch, unable to grasp, unable to hear, looked like water. Pure, but water.

There I had learnt to breathe.

Such heaviness.

I swam, moved deep, I lived.

But halfway—today I can see—full of fear.

He was there, He’s always been…

He can breathe under water too and He did, every day, there, with me.

I tried to come out, I tried to float for years, just to not drown and I fancied myself faithful—I believed.

Every time He called I feared He was calling me deep again, deep underwater and my act of faith was saying yes and He did. Call, that is. And I said yes, I did.

Why, he couldn’t take my surroundings away without making me ready, but one day—

I found dry land.

He opened my eyes when I stopped fighting, embracing the water, loving Him as I did, and just like that…

Feet stood over grass, tall grass, and as I gathered my bearings, I saw Him. No water near but a small pond where I play with droplets and think when I need.

Just a pond, when everything had always been a raging sea,

Dry feet when everything had been hardness and defeat.

I could breathe.

No heaviness.

That was the last time I felt underwater.

-SFTS